Look at how much my life changes between these brief and sporadic posts. I have left beloved Baltimore for the Boston area, living in Somerville, working at the big H in Cambridge. Hil and I have been dating for three years now. Three years. If you've been paying attention to my dating history (and I am reasonably sure you haven't, since I've barely seen this blog in the past year), that was me in your rearview mirror going from 0-60 in 1.7 seconds, passing you, lapping you and the milk from the trophy, and taunting you with zeugmatic NASCAR references. And yet, here I am falling behind again: evidently, everyone's getting married.

My friends Patrick and Tammy are engaged. My brother Adam, eternal bachelor and rockstar wannabe, is engaged. We had an engagement party at our home in New Jersey, which my parents recently renovated, adding among other things a stream that waterfalls into a pond with koi and goldfish. A week before the party, my mom bought three larger koi that I named John, Paul, and George, with the expectation that Ringo would be on the way at some point. Sometime during the week, John turned up dead in the filter; I have been assured that Mark David Chapman had nothing to do with it, but I remain suspicious. I renamed George to Art, and hopefully this duo will last longer.